


Night and Day

by neeeeeeeeep



Category: Grand Theft Auto V
Genre: Explicit Language, F/M, Friends With Benefits, Gen, Oral Sex, POV Female Character, POV Second Person, Reader-Insert, Smut, Unofficial Couple
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-03-03
Updated: 2014-03-28
Packaged: 2018-01-14 11:49:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,699
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1265416
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/neeeeeeeeep/pseuds/neeeeeeeeep
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Trevor Philips is Sandy Shore's well-known psychopath and you're kind-of in a relationship with him. While being associated with someone like Trevor can have its pros, will you be able to cope with the consequences of his lifestyle when he starts to put himself at risk?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so bear with me on this one
> 
> i've been reading a looooooot of Trevor x Reader fics lately (they're such a guilty pleasure of mine urgh ;-;) and i was inspired to write my own. this was the result. it's basically pwp except it's hinting at a plot? idk. basically if people show enough interest in this then i may consider developing the plot and continuing. so y'know, show some love if you want me to continue. <3

Trevor Philips: creator and boss of Trevor Philips Industries and national bad-boy. Anyone who’s anyone in the criminal business knows who he is, and if they don’t he’ll certainly find a way to make himself known.  Famous for being incredibly psychotic and perverted, he’s someone most people try to avoid. Everyone except you, that is.

You lived a normal life before you met him. Went to college, worked on the weekends and hung out with friends – it was the typical life of a girl in her twenties, but after you crossed lives with Trevor Philips everything seemed to take a complete U-turn. While that wasn’t necessarily a bad thing, you knew there were certainly risks of being associated with Trevor, but that was something you could deal with if it meant being near him. He makes your life exciting, something you’ve always craved all the way through your life.

While you aren’t officially a couple, there’s certainly something going on between the two of you. You've been living in his trailer for around a year now, and things have been going great ever since. You’ve even learned to accept Trevor’s odd and dangerous lifestyle.

“I need to take a shower. I stink of your jizz,” you say as you try to get out of bed. You feel strong arms wrap around your waist before you can sit up, pulling you back into bed.

“Embrace that scent, sweetheart,” Trevor mumbles against the back of your shoulder and you laugh.

“I’m convinced you’re trying to mark me as your territory, T.”

“You _are_ my territory,” he replies, starting to press short kisses down your shoulder until he flips you over onto your back and diverts his lips over your collarbone and down the valley between your plump breasts. A shiver rushes down your spine. Why did he have to be so good with his mouth?

“Trevor,” you warn, although it’s half-hearted. You wouldn’t really have a problem if he chose to continue, which, fortunately, he does.

“Don’t leave me, babe,” he mumbles against your skin as he descends your body with his mouth, “I have abandonment issues, remember?”

You roll your eyes. Always with the 'abandonment issues' excuse. While you understand he didn’t have the best of childhoods, Trevor always brings it up in order to get his own way. It’s a very childish move, but most of the time it does work (which you refuse to admit to yourself). “You’re ridiculous.”

“Shh…”

His lips meet the bottom of your stomach and you shiver as he moves further down between your legs. You hadn’t noticed his body moving south along with his kisses, and before you could even process this he’s between your legs, his tongue pressing against your clit. A sharp breath escapes your lips as you feel him rolling your sensitive nub around with the tip of his tongue, and after that you can’t even find the words to express how good his tongue feels, never mind getting him to stop.

Your eyes close as you fall into a state of bliss, your hips rolling as Trevor slips his fingers inside of you and catches your g-spot. You’re barely aware of how loud you’re being now, even since Trevor had admitted to how much he enjoys making you moan a few nights back. It’s like you’ve become trained specifically to suit him, and because of this it’s made you very vocal with your pleasure.

You can feel your climax building up in the pit of your stomach and Trevor increases the pace of his movements. “Trevor… oh, baby, keep going,” you moan, your back arching slightly as you run your fingers through his hair, “right there, T, right the—oh, _God!_ Fuck, fuck, _fuck_!” You’re almost there; so close that you can tell that one more movement will send you over the edge, but just as you’re about to come, you hear someone burst through the front door.

“Trevor!” says a voice from the living room, and your eyes shoot open, your first instinct to cover yourself kicking in almost instantly. The orgasm dissolves back into your body and Trevor gives you a weird look.

“Since when were you fucking shy?” he asks, his brows furrowing as he does.

“Shut up, just find out who’s through there,” you tell him, still covering up with a blanket. You hope it’s nothing important so you can go straight back to getting off, but if not then you’re sure you’re going to feel that pent-up sexual frustration hit you in the face later on.

Trevor shrugs and disappears into the living room. “Mikey!” you hear. “Nice of you to drop in. You just cock-blocked my girl.”

You can _hear_ the smirk in his voice, and you can just tell just from that that Trevor’s going to tease you for it if he gets the chance. You get up and pull on one of Trevor’s t-shirts and a pair of shorts. Who needs underwear anyway?

“You guys fuck each other 24/7. I’m pretty sure she can deal with one less orgasm,” Michael says, and just then you walk out of the bedroom, pulling your hair into a loose bun.

“And that’s why your wife left you, Michael,” you say, smirking as you head over to the kitchenette to grab a beer. That was the good thing about being in whatever-relationship you had with Trevor: he always had beer in the fridge.

Michael grumbles something under his breath and Trevor laughs, but you don’t bother to follow up what Michael said. You just sit on the couch and turn on the TV, although most of the channels are static and what’s on was pretty boring. You just pretend to watch it so you can listen to the boys’ conversation without them knowing you’re actively eavesdropping.

“T, I’ve got us a job – a big one. One that’s gonna make us financially happy for the rest of our lives,” Michael starts. “I know we said we were done but this is an opportunity we can’t miss.”

“Alright, so what is this so-called ‘big job’ then?”

You hear Michael talk about some big bank out in Los Vegas which all the casinos get their money from. It’s one of the richest banks in America, apparently, and Lester’s been keeping tabs on the security for the past few weeks. It’s seemingly not that hard to get passed. America’s banking system was awful, so you didn’t doubt that one bit.

“Well, Mikey, if you think we can do it then let’s fucking do it. You know I’m always up for a good bank robbery, ‘specially if it means I get to take out a bunch of clueless security guards,” Trevor replies and you roll your eyes. Fucking psychopath.

“Fuckin’ A! I’ll tell Lester and try and round up some of the guys. I’ll get back to you when we have more details. This is gonna be a good one, T. I can feel it in my bones,” Michael as he starts moving towards the door.

“No, Mikey, I’m pretty sure that’s just arthritis.”

“Fuck you, T!”

Michael leaves and Trevor turns to look at you. “So, back to the oral sex?”

You grin. “Absolutely.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you've made it this far, thank you so much for reading! i really appreciate it. although i may not have mastered Trevor's characterisation yet, i really love writing him and hopefully i'll be able to write more of him in the future. 
> 
> much love <3


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee new chapter
> 
> okay so i'm not sure people will notice this but i changed how long the reader and T have been living together. i think it's from like four months to a year, just to make this chapter make sense. n.n
> 
> other than that, enjoy! leave some love if you wanna see another chapter. :)

Living with a guy like Trevor Philips has given you a complete new view of life. You’ve never really had to worry about someone as much as you worry about Trevor, but, of course, you always refuse to let your worry show. That doesn’t mean it stops you doing it, however, and most of the time, when you’re alone in Trevor’s trailer and he’s out doing God-knows what, you’re usually worrying about him.

“I’m going out. Should be back later tonight,” Trevor says one morning, about a week after Michael had come over. He’s loading an assault rifle right in front of you and you can feel your gut tensing up watching him. You say nothing about it though and simply smile at him.

“Alright,” you reply, standing up from the couch and walking over to him, wrapping your arms around his waist, “try not to be out too late. I’m gonna order us some food later and then ride you like a horse.” You smirk, looking up at him as you slide your hands down to his ass, giving it a playful squeeze.

“Hey, hey. Don’t say that to me now, princess – don’t want a semi while I’m out murdering people.”

“I don’t believe that’s the first time that’s happened, babe.”

He grins at your remark. “You know me too well, sweetheart.” He leans down and gives you a short peck. “I’ll be back about eight. Be naked when I come home. I want to those perfect puppies to be the first thing I see when I step through that door.” He runs his hands down to your breasts and flicks his thumb over your nipples through your shirt playfully. You smirk.

“Anything for you, baby,” you reply, giving him another quick kiss before he disappears out the door. Your facial expression sinks after he’s out the door, sighing as you run your fingers through your hair. It’s eleven in the morning now – what an Earth could he be doing for nine hours? You shake off the thought. You’ll just have to distract yourself until he gets home, that’s all.  With what, exactly, you have no idea, but you’re sure you’ll find  _something_ to do.

***

You realise soon after cleaning the whole trailer, going grocery shopping to stock up the cupboards and fridge, showering and doing a shit load of girly crap to yourself that you’ve ran out of things to do. You gave up your hobbies after meeting Trevor because Trevor _became_ your hobby, and now you’re stuck in limbo. So, instead of going out and trying to find something to do, you choose the easy option of calling an old friend to entertain yourself. It’s around 3pm now, so you hope some girl talk will be able to take up the rest of your day.

“Hello?” says the voice of your old best friend down the phone.

“Clara, hey! It’s (y/n).”

“(y/n)? Shit, hi! How are you doing? I haven’t heard from you in months!”

“I’m great!” you reply. “Trevor’s busy just now so I just wanted to give you a call and see how you were doing.”

“Oh,” Clara says, and she sounds… hurt? Shit, did you just hurt her feelings? “Well, it’s always nice to hear from you, sweetie, even if it’s a second choice. I really miss you! We all do. You kinda fell off the face of the earth when you started dating Trevor.”

“Trevor and I aren’t dating. We’re just… uh, I don’t know what we are.”

“Oh… well, regardless, the girls and I miss you. We should definitely get together soon!”

“Well, I’m free now if you wanted to meet up?”

“I’m actually on my way up to Sandy Shores for some work stuff just now, by coincidence. I could drop by after I’m done if you didn’t mind?”

You froze. You could just imagine Trevor coming home and completely slaughtering Clara for ‘trespassing’ or something. You shake your head. “I don’t think that’s a very good idea. I… uh, the house is a mess and I don’t—”

“(y/n), you know I don’t care! I just want to see _you_. I don’t care where,” Clara says and you still think it’s a bad idea, but you figure if you get her out before eight then nothing bad will happen.

“Well… alright, but you gotta be out by seven. I’m making Trevor dinner and don’t want him have to wait for it,” you lie, but you know it’s for Clara’s own good.

“That’s fine, darlin’. I’ll see you in about an hour.”

“Can’t wait!”

The phone-call ends and you immediately get to work cleaning up the place. The trailer isn’t particularly ‘homey’ so you do the best you can to make it somewhat welcoming. While you don’t care how you and Trevor live, you do care about what your best friend thinks. You don’t want her to get any wrong ideas about Trevor, because deep down you know he's a great man.

After about forty-five minutes, the place is clean – sort of. You take the extra time you have to change into something more flattering than one of Trevor’s dirty shirts and a pair of shorts. You slip on a casual [baby-doll dress](http://images.asos-media.com/inv/Q/23/48/392983/Black/image1xl.jpg) and flats, sorting your hair out again before you hear a knock at the door. Clara had texted you for the address about twenty minutes before, and you had to tell her it was the last trailer on the right of Zancudo Avenue. Of course, she text back, _'Trailer?!'_ which made you roll your eyes.

You walk to the door, suddenly nervous to see Clara after a year. You open it and Clara’s face brightens up. Your face? It drops. But that’s only because the first thing you see is the bulging stomach under Clara’s clothing. She’s fucking knocked up?

“(y/n)? What is it?”

“You’re pregnant?” you ask, looking up at Clara’s face, finally. It's a stupid question, but you need clarification just in case she has a major food-baby or something…

“Yes! I was going to tell you on the phone but I thought it’d be better to show you.” Clara beams, and you want to vomit. Why didn’t she tell you earlier?

“I… well, this is a fucking surprise!” You falsely laugh. “I’m happy for you, C. I really am. I just… wow, you’re pregnant?”

Clara laughs and steps by you, entering the trailer and looking around. You’re sure she’s disgusted with the place but you’re in too much shock to care.

“That generally happens after you marry a man. You do remember my wedding, right? You were a bridesmaid, (y/n)!” She’s laughing but you can’t find the joy in the situation. You feel like a fool for missing out on such a big event in Clara’s life, and you feel even worse knowing she didn’t bother to tell you.

“How far along are you?” you ask, looking at Clara sitting down on the sofa.

“About six months.”

“Six months,” you repeat. You sit down and look down at your hands, your fingers picking at your nails.

“Look, (y/n), I know this is a big surprise for you. I would have told you, but you were so preoccupied with Trevor that I didn’t want to bug you with my life. You still have four months left to be involved in this pregnancy though, if you look at it that way!”

You look up at Clara and give her a small smile. “I will be involved. I promise. I just feel like such a shitty friend for missing this. I would’ve visited you every week if I knew you were pregnant. I _should’ve_ kept in touch with you – with all of you. I just…” you pause, feeling a little emotional facing the fact that you’ve been such an awful friend this past year, “I just drifted off. Trevor’s life is completely different from my old one, and I let myself get too involved. I promise I’ll be a better friend after this visit.”

“I understand. We all understand, (y/n). We’re all taken women – we know how our men can kidnap us and keep us away from our friends if they feel like it,” Clara laughs, and you give her a weak smile, knowing full well how capable Trevor is of actually kidnapping you. “As long as we can see you more often, then we’ll have no problems.”

You nod. “I promise I’ll come to LS more often to see you and the girls.”

“Good. So, tell me, how are things?”

***

The two of you chat for hours – literally until it gets dark. You completely lose track of time, and only realise what time it actually is when you hear the familiar hum of a truck pulling up outside. Your eyes widen and you shoot up out of your seat, rushing to the window to see Trevor walking out of his Bodhi. Covered. In. Blood. _Fuck._

“Shit,” you hiss under your breath and rush out of the trailer, running over to Trevor and jumping in his arms, wrapping your legs and arms around him. “Hi, baby!” you grin, pressing your lips to his and making him stop in his tracks. You don’t care that you’re getting blood on you. You’re used to that.

“Jesus fucking Christ, (y/n). I’m all for getting it on in the yard but let me fucking get inside first, huh?” Trevor says, pulling you off of him and putting you back on the dirt ground. You pull him back by his hand as he tries to walk forward.

“Wait, Trev,” you say, “can you give me like ten minutes or something? I have company over and I want—”

“Wait, what? Company? Are… are you… _fucking_ someone? Are you seeing someone behind my back?” Oh no. Trevor’s voice turns into a grown and you can practically see the rage bubbling up inside of him.

“No! I mean, yes, but not—”

“I can’t fucking believe this. I can’t _fucking believe this!”_ Trevor shouts, walking back to his Bodhi and grabbing a sawn-off shotgun out of the back of it. Your eyes bulge and you step in front of him.

“Trevor, no! I’m not fucking anyone! I just wanted time to finish—”

“Finish sucking him off, huh? Move out of my way so I can shoot out this guy’s face and ejaculate into his hollowed-out fucking skull.”

Trevor pushes past you and bursts into the trailer door. You rush after him and squeeze by him to step in front of Clara in a protective manner. “ _Trevor!”_ you practically scream, trying to match his volume, but he’s naturally loud and it’s hard to get on the same level as him. “It’s my _friend._ I have my fucking _friend_ over, for fuck’s sake. Put the gun down or I swear to fucking God, you’re going to have to shoot through me to get her.”

Trevor only realises who you’re protecting after Clara pops her head out behind your shoulder. “A… a friend? I… well, you should have fucking told me, alright? Don’t fucking scare me like that, you little—argh! I’m getting a fucking beer!” He marches over to the fridge, nearly takes the door off the hinges as he flings it open, and grabs a beer, pulling the cap off with his teeth.

“(y/n)?” stutters Clara, and you turn to look at her.

“I’m so sorry, C. He’s…” you look over your shoulder at Trevor, who’s already going for his second beer, “protective.”

“I see that. Look, I see I’m not wanted anymore. I’ll call you, alright? Don’t lose contact again, (y/n). Please.” Clara gives you a tight hug and leaves. You turn to Trevor immediately and glare at him.

“I can’t fucking believe you. Who the fuck do you think you are? No, better yet, who the fuck do you think _I_ am? You think I’d sleep with someone else, you deranged asshole?” you hiss at him, and he doesn’t even look at you as he goes for a third beer. You step forward and snatch it off him before he can open it. You want him sober for this.

“I don’t know, (y/n), maybe. I mean, you’re fucking… you’re fucking _you_. Look at you. Fucking hot; tits of an angel, libido of a fucking God – who wouldn’t wanna fuck you? There’s other fucking guys out there with bigger dicks and better bodies, so why wouldn’t you fuck them? I wouldn’t fucking blame you, alright?” Trevor retorts, but you can hear his vulnerable side cracking through. Your face softens immediately and you put the beer down, stepping towards him and wrapping your arms around him.

“Shut up, T,” you simply say, looking up into his eyes, “if I wanted another guy, I wouldn’t have stayed with you. I wouldn’t have moved in with you, and I certainly wouldn’t put up with you coming home covered in blood and guts. Stop being paranoid. I’m yours for however long you want me, and I hope you can say the same for me.”

“Absolutely,” Trevor says, voice soft and calm, “I never want you to leave.”

You don’t say anything, but you lean up and press your lips to his. You love seeing this side of Trevor, because you know you’re the only one to see it. He doesn’t open up to many people, so you’re particularly special to see it.

“Do you wanna go to bed? I’ve had a hard day.”

You nod and follow him into the bedroom. You both strip off into your underwear and get into bed, cuddling up to one another and just lying there. You don’t particularly want to sleep yet, you just want to be with Trevor for a while. And you do just that for a good half hour before anyone speaks. You’re the first one to break the silence.

“T?” you say quietly, not wanting to break the calm mood with a loud voice.

“Mm?”

You hesitate. You want to know where you stand with him; what you are to him, and how he feels about you. But you don't know if he will respond well, or even respond at all. But you decide to pursue, now that you’ve got his attention and he’s calm. “What are we?”

Trevor doesn’t move. He continues to look at the ceiling but still answers, “What do you mean?”

“I mean… I’ve been living with you for a year now. I gave up my life to be with you every day, and yet we don’t have an official status. Am I your girlfriend or are we just friends with benefits? I know this isn’t your kind of conversation, but I’m just curious,” you ask, hoping his response will give you some closure.

Trevor doesn’t say anything for a while after that. You don’t expect him to answer, but eventually, after about two minutes, he does. “We’re… us. Just us. We don’t need a label to define how we are around each other. You can look at an ‘official’ couple and then look at us and realise we’ve got what they have, but even better. We don’t have to follow any criteria that other couples do; we don’t have to get each other sappy anniversary presents, or vomit-inducing Valentine’s Day gifts. We just do what the fuck we want, and that’s what makes us ‘us’.”

You listen to him and you start to smile. He’s completely right. While you may have what other couples have, your relationship with Trevor is completely different. You can’t define your status with him because your relationship can’t be defined. It’s just how it is, and you like the way it is. You don’t say anything but instead lean up and press your lips to his. The kiss is passionate and romantic, but rough and forceful at the same time; much like your relationship. It lasts for a few minutes before you finally pull away and say, “And I love ‘us’.”

It’s moments like these which make you forget about whatever doubts you may have about choosing to spend your life with Trevor. Despite how much you worry about him or how much you disagree with his occupational choices, all of that is forgotten when you’re actually with him. You care about him more than any normal ‘girlfriend’ would care about their boyfriend, and that could never be replaced. You hope your life with Trevor never ends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you guys enjoyed this chapter! I only have a basic end-game idea for this story, so most of these chapters will be written from whatever ideas come into my head at the time. hopefully it turns out alright, because I really enjoy writing these.
> 
> again, if you want to see more, leave me some love (kudos, comments, etc.) and i'll make sure to write more!
> 
> thanks for reading! <3


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wow so I suck so bad at updating and I'm so sorry! life has been so busy and I've not had the time to get in the mood to sit down and write decent content. this chapter is basically a filler, and i tried to make it show the relationship trevor and the reader have. however, this does have some triggering content (i think)? it's kinda like non-con (but not really since consent is given!), but it's basically just trevor getting carried away, which i'm pretty sure he would considering he doesn't have full control of his anger at some points. 
> 
> hopefully this chapter will lead to development in the relationship which will help strengthen later chapters (i hope)!
> 
> anyway, enjoy!

You wake up at around 11am the next morning to find Trevor’s side of the bed empty. You can hear him in the other room and you’re sure he’s on the phone – although it wouldn’t be unusual if he was just talking to himself. He’s speaking like he doesn’t want to be heard, but you listen in anyway. You can’t help but be a little curious.

“…what kind of car are we looking for, Lester? A _what?_ I’ve never heard of that goddamned fucking thing in my life and you expect me to get it for you? The fuck do you think I am, you pathetic little weasel?” Trevor hisses down the phone. You assume he’s in the planning process of the big upcoming job with Lester, Michael and Franklin. _Great, another thing to worry about._

You get out of bed when you hear Trevor ending the phone call. You’re only in one of his shirts and a pair of panties, and you lean against the door of the living room as you watch him pace the room and mutter words under his breath. He looks stressed and you want to comfort him, but you’re sure he doesn’t want to be bothered just now, so you simply walk over to the kitchen area and start searching for something to eat. You look through the cupboards and grab yourself a bowl and cereal, but just as you go to pour it in the bowl you feel rough hands on your waist, quickly running down the skin your underwear isn’t covering. Trevor is still muttering away, but now it’s in your ear and it’s dirty talk. You can tell he’s still pissed off with something and wants a relief, but you’re not sure whether or not it’s a compliment that he’s come to you just for that release.

His growls are starting to turn you on and you soon forget about the cereal you had tried to pour before. Your attention is now on Trevor and you want him to continue. One of his hands slip into your panties and immediately your breath is caught in your throat and all your body can do is focus on how good his fingers feel as they start rubbing your sensitive nub. You part your legs a little more and lean forward on the counter, your ass pressing against his growing erection, which is starting to visibly press against the loose cotton of Trevor’s sweatpants. You live for these moments, when Trevor suddenly corners you and has his way with you. He knows you love it and he completely works off that fact. That’s what makes him the best.

You can tell Trevor is growing bored with his hand movements because he starts tugging his sweatpants down with his free hand. Eventually, he gives up and uses the other hand to push them down, letting them pool at his ankles. Afterwards, he pushes your panties to the side impatiently and suddenly he’s inside of you; thick and filling and it’s slightly uncomfortable when he starts thrusting his hips.

“T, can you—”

He reaches up and covers your mouth with his hand, hushing into your ear and continuing to thrust. He’s taking out his frustration on you and letting it blind him, because he obviously can’t see you’re incredibly uncomfortable at this point. He doesn’t give you time to adjust at all and it’s starting to hurt. You’re panicking now and you can’t say anything without your words being muffled by Trevor’s hand. Your heart is pounding painfully against your chest and you feel yourself start to hyperventilate. Your adrenaline is pumping and your body seems to take over for you when you start to feel pain between your legs. You manage to squirm from Trevor’s grip and push him away, pulling your underwear up immediately and stepping away from him as far as you can.

“What the _fuck_ do you think you’re _doing?_ ” you practically scream. Your chest is rising and falling quickly and you feel sick to your stomach at that moment. You thought Trevor was more considerate about you when it came to sex, but apparently not. “You think just because you’re fucking pissed off that you get to take it out by fucking me senseless without any thought about how _I_ am fucking feeling, huh? That fucking hurt, you selfish cunt!”

Trevor pulls up his sweats and underwear and turns away, starting to pace the room. “I…I-I fucking… urgh, I’m sorry, alright? I’m just having a tough fucking time with th—”

You cut him off, “—don’t you _fucking_ _dare_ make any excuses! I don’t care if you’re having a ‘tough time’. I don’t care if your fucking mother dies, if you go bankrupt, you get fucking sentenced to jail – it still gives you _no_ fucking excuse to take advantage of me like that!”

Trevor looks pissed off but he doesn’t say anything. Instead, he continues pacing, occasionally making the odd grunt out of frustration. And then, without a word, he walks straight out the door and slams it behind him as he leaves. You do nothing and remain where you stand, waiting to hear the screech of tires before you move. When you know he’s gone, you can’t help yourself but burst into tears. You figure it’s the pent up emotion that’s got you in this state and the fact that Trevor, in a way, betrayed your trust. You’d given up your life to live with him and what does he do? Abuse his boundaries with you.

You walk back to the bedroom and climb back into bed, wrapping the blankets around your body and cocooning yourself in attempts of comforting yourself. You’re unsure of what to do to try and calm you down, but fortunately your body decides for you and you drift off into an unexpected sleep.

***

You wake up at around 5pm after that, which surprises you considering you had slept a good eight hours through the night. Trevor still isn’t home, you see as you walk back into the living area, but that doesn’t even surprise you in the slightest. He isn’t a man at all fond of confrontation unless it’s with a gun in his hand.

You scan the place and it physically repulses you to look at it. You want to cleanse yourself completely, so you start with the trailer. You start cleaning everything; the furniture, the kitchen, the fridge, the cookers, the bedroom – anything that _can_ be cleaned, you make sure to get. Then, you go into the shower and scrub yourself. A half hour later, and you finally feel clean and decide to get out. You wrap a towel around you and start towel drying your hair. Afterwards, you step into the bedroom and grab a t-shirt and short leggings to wear after you put on your underwear.

It’s around 8pm when you finish and you realise the day has been pretty much wasted all because of Trevor’s selfish actions. You want to make it better, but you’re unsure if that’s even possible. It takes you another half an hour to finally drag yourself back into the bedroom and pull out a dress. You’ve decided to drive to Los Santos and hit a nightclub; it’s still early so you’re sure you won’t be home too late. You make yourself look _hot_ ; your makeup seems to have turned out nice on the first try for once and your hair is behaving itself. Your dress? Well, let’s just say if Trevor were to see you in it, he’d want to rip it off you. Of course tonight there would be no way in hell he’d be allowed to do that unless he wanted a punch in the nose.

You hail a cab and instruct the driver to take you to the ‘best’ nightclub in Los Santos. On the way, you pull out your phone and call up Clara. Of course, she won’t be drinking with you in her current state but you fancy some company (and someone to keep you upwards during the night). Fortunately, she’s free and since she lives nearby the nightclub, she says she’ll meet you there within the next hour.

***

From the moment you step out the cab and see Clara standing by the door, you make a mental note to look as hot as she does if you ever get knocked up. Damn, she certainly rocks a bump, and she knows it. She’s chosen the hottest dress to flatter her plumper figure and made sure to show off her pregnancy cleavage. She looks great.

“Hey! You look amazing,” you say as you step out the cab after paying the driver, giving Clara a chaste peck on the cheek as you do.

“You too! So what’s the occasion? That phone-call was a surprise.”

“Oh… nothing! I just miss you, is all!”

“Well, I won’t question that,” she jokes, and you’re glad she doesn’t try to squeeze more information out of you. While what Trevor did was not excusable and a horrible thing to do, you still feel the need to protect him. You don’t want Clara knowing what he’s like.

“Let’s go in.”

You take Clara’s hand and lead her up to the bouncer. There are pissed off faces in the line next to the door as he lets you in ahead of the queue of people, but you’re not in the mood to care at that moment. You just want to get drunk with your best friend and forget what happened earlier.

***

By the time 3am rolls around, you’ve lost your conscience. Your brain is so buzzed right now that you can’t even remember how to walk, and so you’ve taken to sprawling out on the sidewalk a few blocks away from the club, giggling uncontrollably to yourself as Clara stands over you.

“(y/n), this is ridiculous. You need to go home. _I_ need to go home, for Christ’s sake. I have a husband! And you have… you have a Trevor. I’m pretty sure he’s losing his shit right now,” she says, hands on her hips.

“Trevor doesn’t give a fuck about me,” you slur, rolling onto your side and not giving a shit that your dress is getting dirty. “I _told_ you what he did to me. If he cared, he would be nice to me. Not treat me like an easy lay, and only keep me around for that reason only.”

You broke your promise to protect Trevor after your fifth tequila shot. By then, you’d lost all sense of filtering and blurted out everything about living with Trevor, including what happened. Of course, Clara was fuming but there was nothing she could do. While you’re still incredibly disappointed and angry at Trevor, there’s still a part of you which wants to stay with him, whether that’s just because you don’t want him to find anyone else or whether you actually have deeper feelings for him than you initially thought.

However, despite how much you _do_ want to stay with him, you don’t want to be near him right now. You just want to stay out as long as possible, stay as drunk as you can and then return to Trevor when you’ve eventually puked your feelings and have let go of your pent up anger.

“Look, I don’t approve of you staying with him or being anywhere near him right now, but I’m pretty sure things are going to get worse if you don’t go home right now. He obviously has a temper, and you don’t want him getting even more heated just because you didn’t go home,” Clara says, and although your sense of reasoning is barely existent right now, you know she’s right.

“Fine,” you mumble, and try to stand up. Unfortunately, you can barely get onto your knees by yourself, and so Clara has to help you to your feet. From there, she hails you a cab and you slur the address to the driver after saying goodnight to your best friend. The cab driver speeds off, and you can’t help but drift off into a deep, drunken sleep.

***

When you finally arrive home, the driver wakes you up with a prod to the shoulder. You’ve severely sobered up and your head is throbbing as soon as you open your eyes. It’s around four in the morning now and starting to get light, and you’re suddenly dreading heading inside the trailer. You’re not looking forward to facing Trevor.

You pay the cab fare and watch as it speeds off down the dusty roads of Sandy Shores. Then, you look back at the trailer and see the lights are still on. _Fuck_.

You make your way towards the wired fence around Trevor’s patch of land, but before you can even open the gate you hear the trailer door slam open. You freeze and look up, seeing Trevor marching out with a face like thunder. You feel your gut drop and you suddenly know what most of Trevor’s victims feel like on the receiving end of his anger.

“Where the _fuck_ have you been, huh? I got home at nine and what do I find? An empty fucking trailer! Where the fuck did you go? Who were you with? You obviously got fucking dressed up for _someone!_ ” Trevor points at your dress, growling his words out at you. He’s pacing the yard now, muttering words under his breath like he did during your argument.

“I was out,” you deadpan, “with Clara.”

“Why didn’t you tell me where you were? You could’ve been… someone could have…” He finishes his sentence with a grunt, and your anger clicks on after hearing his words.

“I don’t have to tell you _anything_ after what you did, Trevor. Why should I? If it wasn’t for my consent, what you did would be classed as rape! You completely violated my comfort boundaries, and you expect me to just phone you up and tell you I’m going out? Fuck you!”

“I’m _fucking_ sorry! I’ve fucking apologised to you already. What else do you want me to fucking say?”

“That’s it, Trevor. That’s your fucking problem! You expect to say sorry and that’ll be it; everything will go back to normal. Normally, it’s fine. But this time, you hurt me. You _physically_ hurt me, and although you probably didn’t mean to, ‘sorry’ just ain’t going to cut it this time.” You open the gate and push past him, marching up to the porch and into the trailer. You hear Trevor following you.

“What are you doing?” he asks, walking behind you as you go into the bedroom. You undress and pull out something to wear for bed. You’re suddenly glad you sobered up, or this would be a nightmare to do, and you’d probably look like a fool for trying to argue with Trevor while you slurred poor sentences at him and fell over your dress as it pooled at your feet.

“I’m going to bed.”

“So you’re not leaving?”

“What?” you ask as you turn around and look at him.

“I thought you were leaving me. Everyone I care about leaves me. I don’t know why you wouldn’t do the fucking same.”

Fucking shit. Why does he have to say stuff like that to you? You’re supposed to be mad at him, not feel sorry for him. Regardless, you keep up your guard and don’t let his words visibly affect you. “I’m going to bed, Trevor," you repeat. "If you want me to stay, then I suggest you try and find a way to get me to forgive you.”

You climb into bed and make sure you lie in the middle, just to let Trevor know that he’s not welcome in the bed tonight. He gets the picture and walks back out of the room, and you listen to his movements until you hear him plonking down on the couch, sighing loudly afterwards. You let out a small sigh yourself and curl up in a ball, trying to find the comfort which Trevor usually provides you with in bed. It takes you a while to fall asleep, and even when you do your body continuously wakes up during the night. This fight is definitely the biggest one you and Trevor have ever had, and knowing that you can’t be close to him right now is definitely messing up your sleeping pattern. You just hope you make up with him soon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oooooooooooooooooh
> 
> so, Trevor's a dick and this is definitely a rough spot in the relationship! like I said before, this will hopefully make them realise the values they have for each other which will make later chapters stronger, i think.
> 
> leave some love if you want to see more! hopefully i'll find some motivation to write the next chapter of To Live and to Die later, but for now that's all, folks! thanks for reading this chapter, and thank you so much for the support you've all given me so far. I really appreciate every kudos/comment you give me! <3


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